Man, that ain’t cool!

It is my firm belief that when I leave this world, the pearly gates will open wide, St. Peter will hand me my very own personalized pint glass (inscribed with something like “Cheers, JC” on it), and I will be directed to the river of that Heavenly libation, Guinness.

Having set the stage of my personal opinion on the origin of Guinness, I offer the following tale…

My partner and I were enjoying our usual cup of morning wake up juice when I saw a delivery truck pull up and stop near where we were standing. It was a Guinness truck. Now I had seen this particular truck and this particular driver on a number of occasions prior to that particular day. I had come to the opinion that he was mocking me early in the day because I was on duty and unable to enjoy the divine elixir that is Guinness. Well, that just won’t do.

I walked over to him and had the following conversation:

MC: Sir, I’m gonna have to impound your truck.
GG (Guinness Guy): Huh? Did I park illegally.
MC: No, you’re good, but I’m sick and tired of seeing you drive around town mocking me.
GG (kind of sees where its going and smirks): Uh-huh.
MC: Seriously, man, get in your truck and follow me to my house. This isn’t funny anymore. You’re just wrong.
GG (now laughing his ass off): Oh, man, you’re killin’ me. Thanks for the laugh.
MC: Who’s joking?

He didn’t take me seriously at all. I must be losing my skill. Dammit…


Every time I see that guy around Town now he smiles and waves. Jerk.

Addendum to the Addendum…

Not twenty minutes after I wrote this post, I saw the same truck driving around downtown. I thought to myself, “This is just too damn good to pass up.” I stopped behind the truck, got out, and as I walked up to talk to the driver, recognition dawned on him and he smiled. Oh, that evil genius smile. I introduced myself and asked him if he’d mind a photo op. He was kind enough to consent.

Ladies and gentleman, I’d like to introduce to you, my new friend (or nemesis, I haven’t decided which yet), Brandon…
Brandon, thanks for being a good sport as well as having the distinction of being the first guest photo on the blog. Now wipe that damn smile off your face and off to my house with that truck!

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic. Snark is encouraged. Being a prat is not.

8 thoughts on “Man, that ain’t cool!

  1. MotorCop humor and Guinness, two great tastes that taste great together…

    Well played, sir, well played…

  2. Hahahahahaha your killing me! But, now that I think about it, there are a couple of trucks I'd like to impound. And I know where I will keep them! – Officer

  3. The first part of your post reminded me of something Jim Gaffigan said, "Why do they have pearly gates on Heaven? What kind of a neighborhood is it in?"

    BTW, your wife is probably busy drinking that beer right now;)

  4. I always thought those trucks should be given red lights. Never know when you'll need frothy goodness code 3.

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