I have a long standing issue with cyclists. What follows may be viewed as a sweeping generalization of cyclists. Hey, if that’s the way you want to take it, knock yourself out. Maybe there’s a reason you’re being so defensive. I’m just sayin’…
If you’re a law-abiding, safe-riding, stop at stop signs/red lights type of cyclist none of this has anything to do with you and I would like to personally thank you for not being a raging, self-entitled douche monster.
That notwithstanding, though, I do have a large issue with a particular cyclist I had the misfortune of contacting not too long ago. I was riding up on a four way stop when I saw a cyclist approach to my right. He hooked a quick right (now headed the same direction I was) without even slowing for the stop sign. And away we go…
MC (yelling out): Sir!
ARSEDM (aforementioned raging, self-entitled douche monster…hell, let’s just shorten it up to ARSE, shall we?): *looks back*
MC: Pull over.
ARSE makes a right in an alley and continues on his merry way.
MC (over PA): Sir, I was talking to you. Please stop.
MC: Thank you. Do you know why I’m stopping you, sir?
ARSE: No. (attitude already developing)
MC: Well, you didn’t stop at the stop sign.
MC: Fair enough. Do you have your license with you today, sir?
MC: Okay. (I grab my cite book). What’s your name, sir?
ARSE: Are you going to give me a ticket?
MC: Yes, sir, I am. You failed to stop for the stop sign.
ARSE: This is ridiculous. Why aren’t you stopping cars that don’t stop at stop signs.
MC: Sir, you do know you have to follow the same rules of the road as vehicles, right?
ARSE (huffs): Yes!
MC: So, you basically just flagrantly defied the law, then? I mean since you know it and all.
ARSE: I didn’t flagrantly do it!
MC: I need your name.
ARSE (mumbling): arse
MC: Excuse me?
ARSE (yelling): ARSE! Why don’t you take off your helmet so you can hear me!!
MC (requests additional unit): Listen, sir, you need to lose your attitude. There is no reason for you to be acting like this. You violated the law, you’re getting a ticket. If you don’t like it, you’re welcome to go to court. What’s going to happen when a car breaks the same law you just did as the same time as you? You’re not going to win that fight. You’re going to get knocked into next week.
ARSE: That will never happen.
MC ponders how nice it must be to have a fully operational and reliable crystal ball. I should have asked the prick where he got one. I handed him his cite.
ARSE: I’ll see your ass in court!
MC: Excellent, sir, I’ll be sure to tell the judge just that.
He continued to berate me like a six year old while I wrote out his ticket. Why is it that there is a distinct statistical deviation between the number of drivers I stop with bad attitudes vs. the number of cyclists with bad attitudes? I would say that roughly 15-20% of drivers have lousy attitudes; however, cyclists are much closer to around 65-70%. I treat them all exactly the same. As a matter of fact, I probably give more warnings to cyclists simply out of not wanting to deal with bullshit attitudes. Methinks I shall have to stop doing that. No reason folks should get a break just because I don’t want the hassle, right?
Like I’ve said in previous posts, if you ride a bike, good for you; however, do me a favor and don’t be a stupid cyclist, okay? Of all the bicycle crashes I’ve taken over the years, about 80-85% of the time the cyclist is at fault, not the car. Cyclists, you are smaller and weight less than a car. You will lose. Save yourself and your family some heartache and follow the rules of the road.
Oh, and don’t send me comments about how the drivers are (insert whiny voice) “so mean to us”. You should know me well enough by now to know that when I see drivers doing stupid shit (be it to you or anyone else) they get their comeuppance as well!
Stay in the bike lane, don’t ride five deep, stay to the right, signal your turns/lane changes and odds are your interactions with drivers (not to mention me) will improve.