Alright. That’s it.

All of us LEOs have posted over and over again about the Attitude Test. If you’ve got a shitty attitude, you’re guaranteed to get a ticket. If you’re honest, your odds of getting a warning significantly increase.

Last week, I worked some Click It or Ticket OT. Two hours into it, I was ready to lose my mind behind the bullshit attitudes I was dealing with. Listen, it’s not a point on your license…it’s just a fine. You’ve no one to blame for your ineptitude by yourself. Calling me an ass and butchering my last name like some jackstick seventh grader is not the way to ingratiate yourself. I don’t care what you call me or what your excuses are. Take some responsibility.
Yadda, yadda, yadda.
So, I went back to the PD before I ripped someone’s head off due to the sheer disbelief (even after all this time) of how ridiculous people are. Then it occurred to me. I need to do a little study. I haven’t hashed out all the details yet, but suffice it to say it will take a minimum of one month to complete.
I’m going to keep my own set of stats for every stop I do. I’m going to try and scientifically half-assedly determine just how full of shit your average driving citizen is. Thus far, I’ve decided to lump folks into one of three categories: the Honest, the Oblivious, and the Liar. I won’t tell the driver they are unwittingly participating in my little study. I will attempt to handle each stop (at least at the outset) as similarly as possible. How they respond and my interpretation of same will determine in which category they fall.
I’ll be refining it before commencing my little study. I’ll either be commencing the study in July or August. More often than not, my posts are about the knuckleheads I deal with, so it truly appears that the sheer number of assclowns in the world is overwhelming. I think there are more of them than the average reader wants to know…and I’m hoping there are less of them than I think. Time will tell…

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic. Snark is encouraged. Being a prat is not.

15 thoughts on “Alright. That’s it.

  1. Oh, oh, this will be fun!! I wonder if you'll be able to correlate us morons to type of stop… like all the liars run red lights but the honest ones run stop signs?? 😀

  2. OMG too funny…

    I should tell my motor buddies at work to do this too. I think people are getting worse with the economy too.

  3. "All right" not "alright."

    Although "alright" appears in novels by James Joyce and Langston Hughes, spelling it as one word has never been accepted as standard and is universally considered a spelling error in publication.

  4. I'm loving the idea, can't wait till you start! The sad part is that there really are that many stupid people out there…

  5. Freakin awesome idea…I'm gonna start my own survey as well. Let me know and I'll give you my results to add in to your stats…

  6. What might be also cool is to correlate the rating with the subsequent ticket vs warning so that at the end it may come down to really understanding what the odds are of getting a warning vs a ticket.

    However, can you not be affected by the fact that you are the one that is also participating in the survey?

  7. BTW, have you ever stopped men who cry? Because when I see them on COPS, I just want to backhand them right across the face.

  8. Great idea! I just hope you share the results of the study with the rest of us:)

  9. This is, of course, a great idea and I am sure you will enjoy the task because, yet again, you will be paid as you conduct it! You are one creative kid! Oh, and by the way – how come is it that Linguistics Stud didn't nail you for "half-assedly and assclown"? These terms conjure quite the mental image!

  10. I find it amazing that you PUBLIC SERVANTS don't even realize the unconstitutionality of the entire click it or ticket bullshit you choose to enforce. Is it lost on all of you that you don't enforce laws at all? All this time and you can't even correlate the difference between COMMON LAW and STATUTES.The entire CDL is nothing more than a contract forced upon the public under duress in lieu of denial of the RIGHT to travel.I know you boys will disagree with me but I doubt any of you will do your homework and refuse to be revenue agents. No one needs saving from themselves. Otherwise I feel it would be my duty to keep all of you from going to work each day. After all I know you are all putting your lives in danger every day and lets face it you must be crazy so I suppose I must attempt to protect you from yourself. Doesn't make any sense to you does it? Try to remember that last group of folks who swore they were just following orders. But I wonder how many of you who swore to uphold the constitution actually remember what is written there.

  11. T.W.G.,

    Wow. Angry much? I'm gonna go ahead and guess you've never seen a 17 yr old girl thrown through the windshield of a car.

    I've posted enough about your bullshit "revenue agent" commentary in the past, so I don't feel obligated to repeat myself.

    "No one needs saving from themselves." Sure. If that was true you wouldn't need me and Reality TV wouldn't be so popular.

  12. Can't wait!!!! I love how the public we serve ends up giving us so many 'blogable moments'.


  13. Really? It's not a point on your license not to wear a seatbelt in CA?

    Wow…in Ontario (Canada,eh?!) if you don't wear your seatbelt it's a $60-500 fine (approx — victim fine surcharges not included) and 2 points on your license!! (We count up, not down?)

    When I worked in insurance (car insurance even) a coworker got stopped for no seatbelt twice in two days. 4 points in two days!! By the same officer!

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