A Little International Flavor

Earlier this month, I got an email with a link to the 12 coolest police cars in action. The majority of them are from Europe where, let’s be honest, they’ve got some ridiculous cars. To the best of my knowledge, your every day beat cop is driving a sub-compact, goofy looking car; however, they have high-performance pursuit cars as well. I’m gonna guess the lion’s share of this list fall into the latter category.

You can check out the list here.
My opinion on the list? So glad you asked. The first thing that stood out to me as I scrolled down the list was to wonder if Europeans have no sense of what colors go together. Was there a clearance sale on cheap day-glo paint? Holy shit…
On the other hand, if you throw me the keys to a Lamborghini Gallardo and it just happens to be bright fucking orange and blue…well, then you ain’t gonna see those keys for quite some time.
The second thing that stood out? What in the hell is what could quite possibly be the gayest car ever (if cars could have a sexual preference, that is) doing on this list of straight up bad ass, no shit, go faster than Flash cars?!? Really, Mini? Don’t try to be so butch. Driving this car as a police officer would be like me riding one of those electric trike pieces of shit because it’s “eco-friendly”. I wouldn’t take me seriously on that thing, why should you?
Lastly, I love that good old-fashioned American muscle made it to the top two. That car just looks mean. Which, in turn, means it will never drive the streets of the Town. We wouldn’t want folks to think we were mean, now.
Thanks for the email, Chris! I loved seeing police vehicle options from the world round!

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic. Snark is encouraged. Being a prat is not.

13 thoughts on “A Little International Flavor

  1. You could start a new contest. How many drunks can you get in the back of a mini?

  2. Excuse me? The Mini is "gayest"???? Come on man, you don't need the stereotypes, do you? Or do you expect to be called 'pig' all the time?

  3. Steve…

    I'm not judging, I'm merely saying if cars had a preference, the Mini would prefer other Minis.

    Lighten up, dude, it's humor.

  4. Actually, while it certainly does remind one of the cop version of a shriner's clown car, from what I hear the Mini Cooper is a pretty bad ass ride for it's size. It's got some pretty good power under the hood and it's supposed to corner like it's on rails. Not my first choice for a car, but there are worse things to drive.

  5. Call me a pig, but the Mini Cooper is GAY! It would be like driving a Prius. Or a so-called Smart Car, which is even gayer than the Mini.

    The Mercedes #1 has a gay light bar on it. Something that goes 225mph needs a light bar with waaaay less drag than that monster. Might as well put a freakin sail on top of it!

  6. The day glo cars are all from the UK. The Battenburg pattern as its known is used on vehicles that will work on Motorways, where traffic is 70mph+, so that when they are guarding the scene of an accident they are as visible as possible, since some idiots seem to ignore the flashing blue lights.

  7. Jeez, guys, would you think I was outta line if I called one of your patrol cars a 'ghetto driver' or 'donut-mobile'???? After all, it's humor, right?

  8. There you go! "Donut-Mobile"! Ya gotta have thick skin in the business, my friend.

    Although, to be fair, this is the 21st century, so "Bagel-Mobile" might be more accurate.

  9. The small print on the Mini says 'Police Public Relations office', so this car is unlikely to take part in a high speed chase, nor is there any need for looking mean.

  10. I'm with you on the muscle cars, they make bad ass looking squad cars.

    One note, I wouldn't question your color instincts as you are right on with the dayglo remark. But, man what gives with the doo-doo brown colored header on your blog? It don't look too good with the stars and stripes. On a serious note the blog sure does load slowly, your masses can't wait for your page to load

  11. OMYGOSH!
    If a popo tried to pull me over in a Mini Cooper, I don't know if I would laugh so hard I'd pee my pants or actually consider trying to get away.

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